What is Curious Kindness?

People living with psychosis and other mental health conditions and neurodivergences experience the world a bit differently.

 I'm one of those people.

At age 13 I found myself in hospital chanting "I don't belong here."

I quickly learned that almost no one felt they belonged there.

It wasn't just there though, my whole live I had struggled with belonging. Social expectations were mysterious to me and I missed them frequently. I didn't have many friends. I had tics, obsessions, attention issues, and a list of over quirks.

But that day I was saying "I don't belong here," I truly felt confused. I didn't know why I was in hospital. In a few days I would be given a diagnosis involving psychosis in what would begin a decades long journey towards recovery.

But at that moment, I didn't take it. 

I told the psychiatrist, "I'm not crazy" while crying at night wondering if I was.

Peer support groups gave me a space to meet other people who have been through this and similar spaces. Some of the most creative and genuine people I've met. They listened without judgement, sharing their own experiences. 

That's  curious kindness.

I felt I belonged, and realized that no one is "crazy." If someone's behavior doesn't make sense to us we just haven't made sense of it yet. 

My experience sort of took the puzzle I'd been building and knocked it apart. 

Yet, connections with others gave me new pieces. Perhaps not from the same puzzle but  ways to make meaning of this, to help others, to learn from seeing things differently.  I created a new image, focused on understanding these experiences, sharing my own, and advocating for compassion towards others living with mental health conditions.

That's curious kindness too.

It's nothing fancy, just a life philosophy that gives a way to thrive in an unpredictable, uncertain, and often tricky world. It's one that  anyone, including mental health clinicians, can use to empower others.

Today, I'm a therapist, writer and speaker. This site is meant to be a space to dive deeper into mental health and share about curious kindness.